As athletes, we are drawn, almost obsessively, to the races that carry the weight of history and the magic of inspiration. We watch them on tv, we talk about them, and we dream about them. Often, we sacrifice hours, energy, and money to qualify for them. Monday, I watched the 127th running of the Boston Marathon. What an epic race. I ran Boston eleven years ago and it’s true what they say about it. It’s just special. You can’t be in Boston on Patriots Day and not feel the magic of the historical event. What happens though when you find yourself caught up in the magnetism of one of these epic races only to discover a disconnect?
When things don’t line up.
Last summer, I earned a spot to race IM 70.3 World Championships in Finland. Because I hadn’t been to Finland and we were coming out of the Covid years, I was eager to travel anywhere. Fast forward a few months. I was sitting in front of my computer searching frantically for accommodations in Lahti. After weeks, I got lucky and snatched a place near the race venue. Quickly I planned a post-race tour of nearby countries and let the holidays pull my attention from racing.
Fast forward again to last week. I was in front of my computer looking for flights. WOW. $$$$. I found myself frustrated and reluctant to spend money on triathlon. In desperation, I kept looking for a deal and avoided adding up the costs of the trip. The longer this went on the more conflicted I became. This Finland race was really starting to stress me out. Suddenly it hit me, I don’t have to go. I can choose something else, or NOTHING else.
Have you ever experienced that? I can’t be the only one who sets out down a path and forgets that I can turn around. I felt a little nervous but physically and mentally relieved at the thought. Immediately I knew. I didn’t want to race in Finland. Wanting an adventurous trip with my family I was trying to make Finland fit. I spent the afternoon letting the thought marinate. While losing my registration money felt irresponsible, spending time and energy on something I wasn’t fully invested in would come at a higher cost. I canceled everything.
A change of direction.
Left with an empty 3 weeks and a credit on my visa from canceled hotels I sat there wondering. At that moment the words, “What if,” were uttered. “What if we instead went on that Holy Land tour with your mom and grandma?” Hmm “Maybe I could also do that bike race with my brother?” Suddenly, I began to feel excited. In a matter of an hour, I went from dreading a trip to being overwhelmed with gratitude for the opportunity to choose again.
Choosing my own adventure.
Does this happen to all of us? Personally, I get caught up in wanting to do everything. Often I say yes forgetting that I can say no. I am lured by the magic of Kona, Boston, and the World Championships. While those races are amazing and I’m grateful I’ve experienced them, I find that following your own path is more rewarding.
Do you want to hike a particular trail, swim around an island, or ride your bike for 24 hours? Are you putting off things that you might regret not doing because you are busy walking down a path that is leaving you feeling empty and bored? You can stop. You can bail. In fact, you should close the laptop, stare out the window, and ask yourself, “Is this what I want to be doing?” My bet is that if you ask yourself the question you’ll know the answer before the moment passes. It’s ok. Sometimes quitting is the right thing to do. If it isn’t a hell yes, it’s a hard no.
I’m writing this to remind you, life should be lived like those choose-your-own-adventure books we read in elementary school. You can choose again, turn around, and repeat as much as you’d like. I’m thrilled that I was able to pump the brakes, pause, and change direction. I hope whatever path you are choosing right now is leading to the places you know you want to go.
If you are on an exciting choose-your-own adventure, please share. I’d love to hear about it.